All of our lives we have a desire to be remembered. It is one of our basic needs to be known and remembered. We never want to be left behind. We never want to be the one not picked. It is inherent in us.
Dementia is sneaky
The longer you work in a skilled nursing home, the more the residents that are there long term become like family. The longer they are there we have the privilege to work with them periodically through the year. Sometimes they have gotten sick or they just have naturally started to lose their strength as they age and do not move around quite as much.
Usually starts off as a quick “tune up”
Normally for a while Therapy sessions are like a tune up. If you have a good relationship with the nursing staff, most times we can catch a decline early and get them right back to what they were able to do. Many of them actually seek you out for help. A couple weeks of therapy and right back to what they were.
Slowly the game changes
This cycle of therapy sessions can go on for years without much issues. Unfortunately when Dementia is involved slowly the game changes. It can be as simple as having difficulty with safety and forgetting to lock the wheelchair brakes. Other tines it can be attempting to do more than they have been able to by themselves and start having falls in the bathroom or out of bed.
Now looking for the best we can get
As the process continues with the progression of dementia we change from restoration to trying to get the best we can. Maybe they were able to walk by themselves with a walker and now are safer with a wheelchair. Maybe they were able to get themselves from the bed to the wheelchair by themselves and now they need help and don’t remember to ask for help. Eventually we might get to the point where someone can’t even follow directions anymore.
The mental decline affects us all
It is very hard to watch dementia take over someone that you have gotten to know in the facility over the years. When you start off and you have established a good relationship where they know not only your name but also about your family. Slowly they need some help remembering which way to go, or even take more time remembering your name. They might even begin to think that you are someone from their far back past. They know you are familiar but think they are back in their younger years……well before you knew them. You can sympathize with their family but it still hits them harder.
As it gets worse they just want to be remembered
They my not remember you anymore. This is definitely a point where some negative behaviors start to show up. They don’t remember where they are or why someone is telling them they have to do this or that. They don’t remember that they have gotten older and need help. They are now desperate to be remembered and not left out because they can’t remember. We can only hope that someday we can find a cure for this horrible disease. But for now we just need to try and remember.
Great job